A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Sorry about my life...
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