I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Randomize
