Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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