party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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