There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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