and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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