I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
