this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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