I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
