There was a lot of him and a little penis
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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