I feel like abortions should bother me more
you have to choose: penises or morals?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
