Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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