The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
