Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
