How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Soap is not a condiment
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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