come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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