return my video game
this boner is exhausting
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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