my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
