Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
