fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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