maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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