I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
