She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
