so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
