try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
