i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
