glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
