it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
