im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
