that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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