i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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