I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
