put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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