fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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