His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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