Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
