This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
foreskin is a definite game changer
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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