last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I checked into jail on foursquare
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
