I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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