he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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