Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
