I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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