She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
