Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
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