69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
