there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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