A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize
