Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Randomize
