My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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