I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
