nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
